Sunday, February 14, 2016

Ranking The Minor League Names Pt. 2

Welcome back to part two of the Minor League name rankings! Last week we covered teams 16-30 and this week we step it up a notch. Who makes the cut as the organization with the #1 ranked MiLB team names?

15. Miami Marlins
AAA: New Orleans Zephyrs
AA: Jacksonville Suns
A+: Jupiter Hammerheads
A-: Greensboro Grasshoppers
R: Batavia Muckdogs

As you can see already, this week is going to be a lot better than last week. There's four really creative names occupied by the Marlins here. I'm a homer and I'm from Jacksonville, but the Suns don't really get anything from me. Love going to the games and all, but there's better names in this system obviously. The Zephyrs were my second lowest ranking and that's kind of surprising. What exactly is a Zephyr? You got me? But the group of the Muckdogs, Grasshoppers and Hammerheads take the cake for the Marlins. The Grasshoppers have one of the best color schemes in all of MiLB and the Hammerheads pay homage to Florida while also being a great name. The Marlins did very well, and that's just team #15.

14. New York Mets
AAA: Las Vegas 51s
AA: Binghamton Mets
A+: St. Lucie Mets
A-: Columbia Fireflies
R: Kingsport Mets/Brooklyn Cyclones

Many of you may be wondering how the Mets jumped Marlins with three of their affiliates owning a Mets name. I'll tell you exactly why. The Las Vegas 51s and Columbia Fireflies, that's why. The 51s are arguably one of the most recognized and unique names in all of MiLB. The color scheme is magnificent and it ties in with the Las Vegas/Area 51 theme. I really need a gif of that History channel guy screaming ALIENS right about now. Brand new for the 2016 season are the Columbia Fireflies and they've absolutely blown me away. The uniforms are already one of the best in all of MiLB. The glow in the dark hats are on fire. Not to mention that the Firefly is incredibly important to the city of Columbia. This is definitely and upgrade from the Savannah Sand Gnats. Job well done, Mets.

13. Houston Astros
AAA: Fresno Grizzlies
AA: Corpus Christi Hooks
A+: Lancaster JetHawks
A-: Quad Cities River Bandits
R: Greenville Astros

The Astros jump ahead of the Mets because of the all around better names. The weight of the two great names pulled the Mets up solely to 14. But lets give the Astros some credit. We've seen many of their top prospects climb through their system so some of us are more affiliated with these names than the others. The Grizzlies are eh but when they pull out the Fresno Tacos uniforms.... oh man. Sign me up. The Hooks color scheme and logo are probably the best in this system. The Baby blue and Navy cmix incredibly well, not to mention the intimidating Hook with a bat. What's a JetHawk? I don't really know but it's working for me. Then you have the River Bandits. Classic Midwest team, baseball with a cowboy hat and bandana as the logo. Nice one Astros.

12. Kansas City Royals
AAA: Omaha Storm Chasers
AA: Northwest Arkansas Naturals
A+: Wilmington Blue Rocks
A-: Lexington Legends
R: Idaho Falls Chukars

I flipped and flopped between the Astros and Royals for the longest time. Ultimately the Storm Chasers and the Blue Rocks were better than the Hooks and River Bandits at the end of the day. How great of a name for city in the middle of tornado alley that the Omaha Storm Chasers? Perfect fit for a great baseball town. The Naturals and Legends don't excite me but the Blue Rocks color scheme and logo helped the defending world champs quite a bit. Baby blue and Navy Blue with a gold trim, yes please. Finally the Chukars... apparently it's a bird but hey, it's an out there kind of name and i'm an out there kind of guy so it bodes well with me.

11. Philadelphia Phillies
AAA: Lehigh Valley Iron Pigs
AA: Reading Fighting' Phils
A+: Clearwater Threshers
A-: Lakewood Blue Claws
R: Williamsport Crosscutters

I'm a Braves fan, that's the worst kept secret in the world. So it hurts to rank the Phillies very high on something. But I have to give credit where credit is due. The Clearwater Threshers are a top five name in all of MiLB. The logo, color scheme and atmosphere of their ballpark make it not only one of the best in the Florida State League but all of MiLB. Ever since the Iron Pigs implemented a bacon alternate logo it's really taken off for the team as far as hat sales go. Reading is apparently baseball town USA but do more with your name please. The Blue Claws are native to that part of New Jersey and the Crosscutters have a cool Lumberjack logo/scheme going on. Plus they play in the town that hosts the Little League World Series every year. Good Job Phillies.

10. San Francisco Giants
AAA: Sacramento River Cats
AA: Richmond Flying Squirrels
A+: San Jose Giants
A-: Augusta GreenJackets
R: Salem-Keizer Volcanoes

Let's start off with the GreenJackets. How cool of a name is this? It's a play on words of the Green Jacket that's given out to the champion of The Masters golf tournament every year in Augusta, Georgia. That's awesome. One of my favorite names personally. Obviously we know which team really helped the even-yeared warriors. The Flying Squirrels, yes please. They could've been content with just the Squirrels but they step it up a notch and BAM! Flying Squirrels (sorry for the lame Emeril reference). Finally the Volcanoes help a little in their scoring as well. The Rookie ball level teams tend to be boring and bland, but the Volcanoes might be the cream of the crop.

9. Seattle Mariners:
AAA: Tacoma Rainiers
AA: Jackson Generals
A+: Bakersfield Blaze
A-: Clinton Lumberkings
R: Everett Aquasox

The Mariners scored two perfect scores with their lower level teams. Remember when I said the Volcanoes might be the cream of the crop? Yeah it's the Aquasox. Game. Set. Match. Three great logos and Full House promotional jerseys? You win Aquasox. Let's not get blown away by just their rookie team, the Lumberings though >>>>. What kind of name is that?! An awesome one! A big dude with a crown on his head and swinging a huge piece of lumber as the logo. Yes. It's these two teams right here... things like that make my love for Minor League Baseball grow.

8. Milwaukee Brewers
AAA: Colorado Springs Sky Sox
AA: Biloxi Shuckers
A+: Brevard County Manatees
A-: Wisconsin Timber Rattlers
R: Helena Brewers

For a team that's starting to rebuild, you might as well stockpile great MiLB names as well. The class of this group is the Biloxi Shuckers. The Shuckers were brand new for the 2015 season and honestly they were second best name to debut. You'll see why later. But that name and the logo (Oyster swinging a bat) make this a top 10 name in all of MiLB. Let's not forget about the Manatees too. It's not a flashy name by any means but who doesn't love a Manatee? Finally another one of those widely recognized names is the Timber Rattlers. Just like the Mudcats, go to any little league field across the country and I bet you'll find a Timber Rattlers team. That gets you some points.

7. Detroit Tigers
AAA: Toledo Mud Hens
AA: Erie Seawolves
A+: Lakeland Flying Tigers
A-: West Michigan Whitecaps
R: Connecticut Tigers

We're starting to see a run of Florida State League teams take over this countdown and it continues with the Lakeland Flying Tigers. Not only do they have one of the best hats in the game, the name has history to it. Joker Marchant Stadium, where the Flyers call home, was built on the site of an old training ground for fighter pilots. These pilots were called the Flying Tigers. So not only are they a Tigers affiliate, they also have some historical significance to the name and Lakeland itself. Go Tigers. The Mud Hens hold their own too, let's not forget about them. That name has to be one the most out there and random names. But here, that's what gets you points. Round it out with a couple of above average names and you have yourself a ranking in the top seven.

6. Oakland A's
AAA: Nashville Sounds
AA: Midland Rockhounds
A+: Stockton Ports
A-: Beloit Snappers
R: Vermont Lake Monsters

Are you starting to see what separates these teams from the ones in the last countdown? The Nashville Sounds. A rockstar winging a guitar like a baseball bat. This is what's great about MiLB. This is what Taylor Swift was singing about in "Wildest Dreams". Perfect name for the city. Oh hey and then there's the Lake Monsters. Their tri-panel hat is a top five hat. Their name alone gets them noticed though. We also have a snapping turtle as a mascot for the Snappers. Nothing like a grumpy turtle swinging a bat. Ports and Rockhounds... ehh they're ok. But the Nashville Sounds ladies and gentlemen. My goodness, take me away.

5. San Diego Padres
AAA: El Paso Chihuahuas
AA: San Antonio Missions
A+: Lake Elsinore Storm
A-: Fort Wayne Tin Caps
R: Tri-City Dust Devils

We've finally reached the top five here folks and we start it off with the Padres. First off, I want to go on record saying i'm not a fan of the name "Chihuahuas". BUT it seems to be incredibly popular among the fans of MiLB. it did win the "Clash Of The Caps" competition back in 2014, their inaugural season. Plus it's a tie in with the hispanic heritage of El Paso. The you have the missions and its correlation to The Alamo in San Antonio. The Storm have arguably the most recognizable hat/logo in the game with the black and red eyes. The Tin Caps have to be the best name here. An apple with a Tin Cap on its head, another classic folks. That's why we find the Padres in the top five.

4. Minnesota Twins
AAA: Rochester Red Wings
AA: Chattanooga Lookouts
A+: Fort Myers Miracle
A-: Cedar Rapids Kernels
R: Elizabethtown Twins

Look out folks, the Lookouts finally made an appearance in the countdown. The logo and hat have to be THE CLASSIEST in all of the names mentioned on this list. Plus the correlation with the Lookouts across the mountains in Chattanooga. It's a great name. The Kernels are exactly what you'd think they'd be. A kernel of corn! Homage to the midwest and corn country. I'm not really sure what the Miracle is/are. Names that aren't plural are risky but they pull it off. The Twins affiliates have really popped onto the scene in the last couple of seasons with the rising of their prospects through the system. The names don't disappoint either.

3. Tampa Bay Rays
AAA: Durham Bulls
AA: Montgomery Biscuits
A+: Charlotte Stone Crabs
A-: Bowling Green Hot Rods
R: Princeton Rays

Durham Bulls, Bull Durham. If you haven't seen the movie then you won't understand why that team is up so high. Classic team, classic movie. Way to go Rays. Quick, when you think about the south what's one of the first things that pop into your head? The food, am I right? Then the Montgomery Biscuits would easily be the class of the Southern League in AA. What an original name. The stone crabs away hats might be the best away hat in all of MiLB with the Baby blue and navy blue. Obviously that's a favorite clash of colors of mine if you haven't noticed by now. Finally the Hot Rods, not a fantastic name that blows you away, but certainly gets the job done and is above average. That's why we find the Rays in the top three.

2. Cincinnati Reds
AAA: Louisville Bats
AA: Pensacola Blue Wahoos
A+: Daytona Tortugas
A-: Dayton Dragons
R: Billings Mustangs

The Daytona Tortugas. That is all. The BEST name and logo in the sport. Hands down, game over. The Tortugas were brand new for the 2015 season and boy was it a memorable one for the Reds' affiliate. The Reds took the Daytona affiliate from the Cubs and transformed them into the 'Tugas. If you can get out the "The Jack" for a game, I'd highly recommend it. Remember the Nashville Sounds? Well I'll raise you a Louisville Bats. The home of the Louisville Slugger, how about that for a play on words? And yes, the logo is the animal bat, not the baseball bat. I mean the Reds just keep it coming with the Blue Wahoos and the Dragons too. This is pure creativity and the Marketing department for the Reds gets an A from me. But not an A+. Because it wasn't quite good enough to top...

1. Colorado Rockies
AAA: Albuquerque Isotopes
AA: Hartford Yard Goats
A+: Modesto Nuts
A-: Asheville Tourists
R: Grand Junction Rockies

This. Is. Perfection. The Colorado Rockies blew my mind when I saw these names. They have the best name at three levels of MiLB. The Isotopes, The Yard Goats (new for 2016) and the Tourists. If it wasn't for the Tortugas, the Nuts would be up there too. I mean just sheer greatness lies within this system. Not only do they have one of the best Minor League systems of any team, we are lucky enough to watch their top prospects rise through a system of incredible names. The Tourists play at one of the oldest stadiums in the country and pays homage to the vast tourism Asheville gets each year. The Nuts... idk what to say but it wins. Go Nuts! The Yard Goats are brand new for 2016 and it isn't a goat. Yes the logo is a goat, but it's actually the name of a small train that pushes and shunts cars around the train yard. Then the Isotopes, man just stop it. This is what I live for. The Rockies have it all and are the envy of every team out there when it comes to names. Congrats to the Rockies for your creativity because certainly they won't be winning many games in the Mile High city this season.



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